The Healer needs Healing....

Hello everyone!! We have made it to the year 2022. I hope everyone is safe and well. I pray everyone can find some peace and joy during these uncertain times. I have missed you all and wanted to take a moment to give an update on what is going on with me and my family. 

I know I have been missing in action (sad face). There have been some things that I have been working through. To be completely honest and transparent I needed to take time for my healing! Yes, the healer needs healing too! These last two years have been difficult for us all! I am no exception. 

My family has lost members, I lost my job in August, my fur baby went missing in September, also dealt with financial issues in the last quarter. Add in the kids back and forth in school due to COVID. The doctor found tumors on my adrenal and in my uterus in October. I was still pushing through.. being strong.. smiling... go through hellllllll but still being present for everyone and everything! In short, I was taking care of everything but me! Yes, my workings were still potent for my clients, hell the workings I did for myself were still popping lol. But I was drained, my cup was empty. I forgot the most important part... I COME FIRST!!! I can't pour from an empty cup. Self-sacrifice ain't cute... it's not healthy, and you will pay for it in the end ( trust me I know). 

But there is more...To add insult to injury.. my husband my son and I caught COVID during the holidays. My husband's birthday is Christmas Day, we were down and didn't get to celebrate. We could barely stay awake, it was bad. My kids had to uber eats every day, I used Amazon, my mom brought groceries even though she was sick too! My grandad made us soup and a care package and left it on the porch on my grandma's birthday. I am so grateful! We literally had every damn symptom that raggedy-ass virus contains. Thank goodness my daughter didn't catch it, she was our little angel and I don't know how we would have made it without her!  She stepped up and cooked, gave us meds, cleaned, anything we needed she did it, all while still virtual learning! 

On New Year Eve I woke up and went to the bathroom at 5 am and couldn't breathe. Couldn't catch a breath through my nose or mouth, my daughter heard me gasping and jumped up and ran in the bathroom to help me, brought me an inhaler, water and sat with me as I panicked, gasped, and cried. Scary as hell! I still tear up thinking about it, because what if she didn't hear me?? Ajahboo is my angel!!!! She is so wise and helpful at 11 years old, and I love her soooo much. Looking back I probably needed to go to the hospital for oxygen, because I couldn't walk without being winded. God and my spirit guides never left me, they gave me enough strength each day to say thank you for waking us up and keeping us!  Even when I was exhausted, sad, crying, and trying to take care of us while barely hanging on myself, I prayed all day and all night. 

I pulled out all my herbs, and knowledge and got to work clearing our lungs, fixing the pains, etc. My grandparents had COVID in October of 2020 and I put together a kit to get them through and kept them out of the hospital, so I referenced what I did for them and worked on us. It was difficult but we are improving. We had our follow-up visits with the doctors and working on being 100%. It takes time and we are being patient.

I know this was a lot! However, I wanted to share the difficult times too. I have shared my excitement, my wins, my joy, it is only right that I am transparent about this part of my journey as well. I am working on forgiving myself for not showing up for myself among other things. I say all this to say we are all healing from something. No one is 100% healed, and guess what? That's ok.. when you wake up each day you get to make efforts towards your healing. Give yourself grace. I will see you all soon. Remember to be kind to yourself, and others you have no idea what battles others are facing. I love you!